Couple linking fingersKnowing who you are, how you move through life, and what you expect from life are important points to be aware of when looking for a mate. If you are unrealistic about who you are, your frequency will likely be weak and confusing to others, preventing you from attracting the right person.

Be sure of your belief system. What do you consider right and wrong? Your values affect how you make decisions in your life. When you are with a partner with the same values, decision-making as a team will be easier and your bond will grow strong. You will have a common foundation from which to make important decisions regarding investments, child-rearing and career moves.

Discern to what degree you can tolerate another person's differences. You may both have the same values and ethical beliefs, but what if one of you is messy and the other one is neat? Can you adjust to another's habits without compromising your integrity? Let's say you cannot stand smoking or drinking and you meet a wonderful person, but he or she smokes or drinks. Can you let it go if it is the occasional smoke or drink? Will you tolerate someone who smokes and drinks moderately? Or do you give this person up altogether? One of the greatest mistakes people make in their relationship is thinking they can change someone.

Spend time really getting to know the other person's background. This includes their upbringing, culture, religion, education, parents, family size, and birth order rank. All of these factors play a part in a person’s make-up and how they view life. Have they been indulged growing up, or do they know how to work hard? Do they want children? How are you expected to spend holidays as a couple and how will you raise your children together? Know how you feel about your own background - what you will hold onto and what you would like to change.

Health plays a huge role in a relationship. A lot of us are blind to this issue when in love. Chronic allergies, insomnia, neuroses, depression, disabilities, and genetic conditions affect a person’s lifestyle and can give you insight into their future potential. The state of your mental and physical health will also have an impact on your relationship. Are you active, mellow, lazy, or nervous? Is it natural or difficult for you and your partner to take care of yourselves to maintain the quality of your relationship? Health and energy level affect how you can love each other, how you get things done, how you do your job, and how you raise a family.

Even your choice of food plays a vital role in creating a good relationship. Eating is a social activity. How you feel about food and your food choices reflects who you are. Meat eaters, vegetarians and vegans not only eat different food, but have different attitudes towards life related to their diet. If you and your partner are on two different diets, it requires extra effort to execute the simple task of eating. More often than not, differences in eating habits can put a strain on a relationship if you aren't clear up front on how they are to be handled.

Personal habits and hygiene are another issue you need to be aware of in yourself and your partner. Being a clean and tidy person may seem like a plus to you, but if your partner is anything less than that, will you be able to overlook it? Seemingly harmless pet peeves, such as nail biting, being a couch potato, collecting, avid recycling, smoking, drinking, leaving the toilet seat up, squeezing toothpaste from the middle, or hogging the blanket can grow into bigger problems in the future.

Unless a trait is harmful to yourself or others, don’t judge yourself or change into something you think is desirable. You will be putting out a false image of yourself, your aura will not be as bright, and you could possibly attract the wrong person. When you appreciate your quirks, your unique view of life, and are honest about who you are, you are more likely to find that perfect fit.

"What do you consider right and wrong? Your values affect how you make decisions in your life. When you are with a partner with the same values, decision-making as a team will be easier and your bond will grow strong."

~Jenny Liu, Feng Shui Master